Loss in Relationships
“So we are convinced that every detail of our lives is continually woven together for good, for we are his lovers who have been called to fulfill his designed purpose.”
Romans 8:28 TPT
I never thought it would happen to me, having people I truly loved leave my life. I’m not talking about death or divorce in marriage, but about the painful split of meaningful relationships. In nearly 25 years of business, leadership, and coaching, I’ve experienced the loss of relationships with individuals I cared for deeply. That’s a hard thing to live with, but sometimes it’s the cost of leadership. If you lead long enough, people will be offended, and some will walk away.
You can’t control their actions, but you can control how you respond and how you allow it to shape your life. Those tough moments reveal how much someone truly values the relationship. Those moments also reveal your true character and you learn a lot about yourself by how you react to that situation.
When I first began coaching basketball and stepping into leadership, I would hear seasoned leaders talk about the pain of losing people they loved due to offense. I always thought to myself, that will never happen to me but it did. And I’ve learned that not everyone is in your corner. When the chips are down, you find out who is really with you. It hurts, but holding onto that hurt will only weigh you down and distract you from your God-given calling.
The Bible gives us examples of betrayal and disappointment. In Matthew 26:69–75, Peter denied Jesus just moments after pledging his undying allegiance to Him. If Jesus, the Son of God, was betrayed, we shouldn’t be surprised when it happens to us. But the beauty of Peter’s story is this: he was forgiven, restored, and used mightily by God for the rest of his life. That’s our model, like Christ, we must forgive those who hurt us. Life is a series of seasons.
Some relationships are only meant for a season, not a lifetime. When one season ends, don’t despair, God often uses the next season to bring fresh relationships that can enrich your life and help carry you to the next level. So, I want to encourage you: keep your heart free from bitterness, embrace forgiveness, and stay open to what God has ahead.